There's Something Between Her Ears!

My daughter has a full time job and goes to school full time. She doesn’t have a 9 to 5 type job. She’s an investigator, which requires her to work all kinds of odd hours and deal with all the paperwork that accompanies a job like that. She’s also working on her M.B.A., which requires her to attend classes, work on presentations, read, study and meet with study groups.

She’s a little bit of an over-achiever. Yes, I’m bragging on her a little, but there is a story here.

She went to college away from home and when she graduated and moved back to the area she had her own apartment. So, she’s been on her own for a while. About a month ago, she decided she would move into our basement to save some money.

Even though she’s living in our basement now, we still don’t see all that much of her. But it has been nice having her around more than she was before.

Part of her day today: She tried to track down someone she’s been trying to interview for a few days. She’s been told not to go to this interviewee’s house without a male co-worker because of the reputation of the neighborhood and the person she is to interview. So today, she got one of her co-workers to go with her to the neighborhood in question to see if she could find this woman.

No one answered the door, again. But as she started to walk back to her car a man rushed over from across the street. He said, ‘I know who you are and I know why you’re here.’ He went on to say he was glad they were there because he was tired of all the sh*t going on in the neighborhood. He then proceeded to tell her that he’d spent a year and a half in Vietnam and hadn’t seen as much sh*t as he sees in that neighborhood.

He said, ‘You go ahead and do your job.’

‘No one is home’, she replied. ‘I’ll come back.’

‘She’s hiding from you.’

‘Where is she then?’ my daughter asked.

‘She was right out here when you drove up, you saw her. You know where she went.’

‘I’ve never met her. I don’t know what she looks like, I didn’t see her.’

‘You saw her, she’s hiding, go get her, I’m tired of her doing that sh*t.’ ‘Everybody here does that sh*t and I’m f**kin sick of it. You had to see her, she was right there when you drove up.’

‘I didn’t see her. I was looking at the people on the sidewalk when I drove up. Where is she hiding?’

He looked at her quizzically and then looked at her male co-worker. ‘She’s awful pretty, but there’s nothing between here.’ he said, pointing with great animation at his ears.

Her co-worker tried to help her out by explaining to the man that no one had come to the door and they couldn’t go in with only suspicion. The man shook his head and replied, ‘She’s hiding, you know where she is.’

‘She’s in there doing that sh*t right now, hiding.’ His bling glistening as he spoke.

‘What sh*t is she doing?’ my daughter asked, wanting him to be more specific. ‘Doin sh*t’ doesn’t always stand up in court.

‘You know what I’m talking about. She’s doin’ sh*t right now. Now, you go do your job. I know you’ll do the right thing.’ Looking at her co-worker, he motioned towards his ears again, shaking his head vigorously. ‘There’s really nothin’ in there, right? She’s mighty pretty though’.

Trying to help again, the co-worker said, ‘If you could tell us what sh*t you think she’s …’

‘I don’t think, I know what sh*t she’s doing.’

‘As soon as you leave, she’s gonna come out here and jump all over me want’n to know what we been talking about. And I’m gonna tell her ‘Go on now B*tch, I told them what sh*t you been doin’ and I’m sick of you doin that sh*t and all the sh*t your bringing down on this neighborhood.’

He went on in this vein for a while. My daughter was taking notes and he began instructing her on what to write and spelling words out for her at times. Several times looking at her co-worker, nodding towards my daughter, gesturing towards his ears and shaking his head.

‘When you get her, you tell her it was me that told you.’ He said at one point.

‘What’s your name?’ the co-worker asked.

‘I’m the nosey neighbor.’ He replied.

‘Okay, but what’s your name?’ My daughter said.

‘I just told you.’ Looking at the co-worker, nodding towards my daughter, gesturing towards his ears and shaking his head again. ‘She’s real pretty, but there’s nothing between her ears.’

In his own way, he was trying to do something for his neighborhood. He was right about all but one thing he said.

She does have something between her ears.